I remember meeting the prettiest police in aaaaaaaaaall of the land.
'Twas on my 23rd birthday when I got a bright red tricycle from my parents. Overjoyed with my newly aqcuired 3-wheeler I immediatly took it out for a stroll along five-hooker-avenue, I was so happy. Not knowing that this night would forever haunt me for the rest of my life, like a stain on my brain.
As I performed a crazy 2-wheeled corner to the right all of the girls and tranny hookers were in awe. It was clear to me that I, hayabassie, was the attention of the night. Driving passed the hordes of prostitutes there was one that catch'd me eyes. Fat porky legs wrapped in fishnet stockings, biggest tits in the world, hair that never seemed to end and an ass that would have better suited an african-american mother of 6. I felt this strange tingling feeling down below that I never felt before, also my butthole was flexing at an exhilarating rate but this may have been the lasagne I ate 2 hours prior.
Anyway, naturally I put on my greatest pokerface and drove by as cool as possible. With success. The angel yelled at me "Yo dawg, you looking to put your weener in my vag." My heart skipped a beat as I put my tricycle in an emergency stop. I turned my head in slowmotion, my hair dancing in the soft cool breeze. Just as I wanted to open my mouth and reply I was rudely interrupted, "Yea lets do it baby." I looked to my left and there he was on his pink tricycle. He glared at me and said "She was talking to me dog, I'm much more ignorant than you." I didn't fully understand his choice of words, but whatever, he was not going to stand between me and the love of my life. I told him to back off, but his persistence was remarkable. We would have to settle this, as men.
As we stopped at the nearest red light I was already preparing myself for the upcoming battle, tightening my gloves and re-aligning my seat and steeringwheel. Inbetween I asked him what his problem was. He screamed "OH you think its okay to only invite eternal members to your birthday party huH!!? Leave us little people out!! WELL FUCK YOU MAN!! That pretty girl is mine now!" I wanted to apologize to him but the light already turned green and he took off in a frantic wheelie. I made a U-turn and drove back towards the hooker. As we finished making the necessary business arrangements she kicked me of my tri and handcuffed me "Police bitch, your under arrest".
I never got my beloved tricycle back after that, supposedly they needed it as evidence or something. Sometimes when I think about it I cannot even speak an
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