complaints

So let me get one thing straight, I'm a pee-and-brush kinda guy. I'm an excellent multitasker (evidently, I'm a man) and have been doing this since the beginning of time.

Now come February I was on the search for a new toothbrush and with all good toothbrush searches it ended with a recommendation from a friend of mine. This was going to be the one. I placed the order but apparantly its order specifications were out-of-date and I had to wait for it for a good month. No sweat, good things come to those who wait...or so I thought. How terribly presumptuous of me.

Let's take a look at the details of this toothbrush found on the website first. I will translate it to English for you chumps because for some odd reason Dutch still hasn't become one of the most important and influential languages in the world.


-Integrated tongue cleaner
-Extremely mild for cleaning teeth and gums
-COMFORTABLE GRIP!!
COMFORTABLE GRIP!!
COMFORTABLE GRIP!!COMFORTABLE GRIP!!COMFORTABLE GRIP!!
COMFORTABLE GRIP!! <- this is important


On friday the 1st of March I received an email that my toothbrush was going to be delivered the following day. I made a promise to myself to not pee before acquiring my new toothbrush so I could get the best experience possible, easier said then done believe me. It was of no suprise that I felt a huge relief when on the 2nd of March 13:34pm the sound of the doorbell echoed through my house, I rushed to the delivery man and proceeded to take care of his package. Let me tell you it looked beautiful guys.

I placed the box on my living room table and just stared at it for a good 15 minutes. The design was absolutely flawless, the rich colours it displayed nearly fibrated with life and the bright red bow on top had one of the sweetest aroma I ever smelled, like newly fresh panties BUT BETTER! At one point I just became so emotional I think I actually shed a tear.

After my 15 minutes of gloating I eagerly started opening the box. In my uncontrollable excitement I broke one of my nails, but it didn't even matter to me. The adrenaline bursting through my plums and my body prevented me from feeling any kind of pain. I took the toothbrush out and pointed it to the ceiling for 10 second, I felt like a God.

I ran upstairs, flung some paste on it and dropped my underwear. Before you know it I was peebrushing. This is where it all went downhill, my beloved toothbrush slipped out of my hand and started falling towards the urine filled toilet. I tried to use my quick-wits and catlike reflexes to grab the descending brush midair but I failed miserably. At first I didn't make a big part of this, after all I was still a bit shaken up for using my virgin toothbrush for the first time. I potentially faulted my own hand mechanics, preposterous I know! I gently placed the toothbrush back into my mouth an started brushing once more...and then it happened again.

Over the past 2 days this problem has occured to me numerous times. It's not a "I don't know what I'm doing" kind of situation. I have over 25 years of experience brushing teeth and read the manual thoroughly. I decided my only option that I had left was to make last sunday my brushingteethday, it didn't help though. My gums are absolutely burning right now, I must have brushed on at least 20 separate occasions. Everything I eat know tastes of blood and my mouth is filled with warts. I feel betrayed by my friend, the company and most importantly...my brush.

I'm thinking of calling the website and explaining the situation, maybe I can get a refund out of this or trade my faulty brush with another more RELIABLE! one. If anyone has encountered a similar problem like this, please, I accept tips and tricks on toothbrushing techniques and/or quality toothbrushes.


Oh and btw if you're going to respond don't tell me to brush my teeth in the shower, I'm already pre-occupied with other activities in there.

-a very disappointed hayabassie


PS. I will also not resort to a shit-and-brusher guys, please, I have dignity

have you recently started to vaseline your hands? whilst this has the advantage of leaving them as soft as a babies bottom it has the side affect of reduced traction.

Wee need more threads like this.

Have you considered electric? They are waterproof so can survive their inevitable fall into the toilet and require a much less vigorous motion to use and might be easier to keep hold of

have you recently started to vaseline your hands? whilst this has the advantage of leaving them as soft as a babies bottom it has the side affect of reduced traction.

No, but I regularly vaseline other parts of my body that I wish to leave unmentioned here. Let's just say that my lefty is my dirty.

Have you considered electric? They are waterproof so can survive their inevitable fall into the toilet and require a much less vigorous motion to use and might be easier to keep hold of

Absolutely not! I'm repulsed by electrical devices and sworn an oath to never use anything mechanically enhanced. I'm insulted and disgusted by your suggestion.

hmm ok.

i first thought of this for you but then felt foolish as i realised that you needed a free hand for your other business.

So upon searching a little further i found this wonderous invention

Want to know how to solve this problem? Follow these easy steps!

1. Get a Wii Remote Controller.
2. Break off the wrist strap.
3. Attach said wrist strap to brush somehow.
4. You now have a brush that will never fall from your hands!

You could alternatively just buy a wrist strap. But who doesn't like breaking a part of a Wii?

Have you tried a combo toothbrush?

Might help you focus.

I rushed to the delivery man and proceeded to take care of his package. Let me tell you it looked beautiful guys.

That combo toothbrush look's something like rose hide's under her pillow

This is what Rose keeps under her pillow.

Nothing else mate.

Benny, I thought in the rusty spoon too :P

The feeling of rust, against my salad fingers is almost orgasmic.

I Must find, the perfect spoon

/sigh

omg Rose, that is such a long time ago! lol

10 years almost!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3iOROuTuMA

Seriously man, bots helps me out time and time again. 'Tis just the best place to ask about delicate manners such as these. Tried asking it on other fora as well like the one direction fan club but mostly just got old dudes asking me for nudes, btw where is Jans?

For now I'm inclined to go with Zal's approach though. If I got the time I'll take a picture of said creation in action.

I was at the university when reading this - so as a consequence I was forced by the professor to read it to the whole class. Fun times.

This - because I was having too much fun, laughing and all.

Did the class enjoy it?

Yup xD. Though they found my accent even more amusing.